The Vow to Never Do Harm

The Vow to Never Do Harm

Swan Lore Story

I made this doll for Kristen after she journeyed through her Swan Lore session. There were many clues and hints in this doll for new surprise and gifts that were coming to Kristen but were unknown to us both at the time. But they were known to the dolls...

Today I share Kristen's beautiful Swan story because I feel it touches on an old belief and fear that we carry as women from the Burning Times - that somehow working with nature and magic means that we are doing harm. Or the fear that what we are doing will be misunderstood and lied about and we will be labelled as our great grandmother witches and healers were and persecuted for it.

When I sat in session with Kristen I was very moved because I could feel how pure and rare her spirit was. It's always a gift and honour for me to sit with others in the Swan Lore sessions because I receive so much too. Something really unique was happening as I sat with Kristen, it was as if an older part of myself somehow recognised her. Often, before a session people tell me that I visit them in dreams. It's never something I intend or do consciously but I'm always happy to hear that this happens as if the Swan has made introductions. It wasn't until she wrote and sent me her Swan story afterwards that she told me about the dream she had before we even laid eyes on each other:

"First I want to tell you about the dream I had the night before the Swan Lore session. I was speaking with you and a friend of yours, a maiden helper- deciding about some sort of round symboled jewels to wear on my third eye. I did not recognize any of the symbols; some had animal spirits, but none of them spoke to me even though they were all so beautiful. We began talking about Iceland, and we traveled together to the volcanic rocks outside of Keflavik along the coast. You shapeshifted into an Elf Woman as I told you a story about my son seeing a troll among the rocks. You were speaking Icelandic, in a trance- your pupils were pinpoints, your ears were slightly pointed. You stayed that way, speaking Icelandic in trance until I woke up."

And now for the retelling of my Swan Lore story:

'As I looked into the pool, I saw myself- I was young and had very long red, wavy hair. As the well water rippled I saw a woman, ancient and weathered, with hair like mine but white and gray. I followed her and we arrived at her home in the woods where she lived alone. It was a small cottage, well taken care of, but round and the light was dappled and happy though the leaves of the great trees towering above us. She was used to being alone and moved with ease as she led me down the carefully laid stones to the house. On her arm she carried a basket filled with plants and roots and along the pathway and surrounding the house were a number of plants used for medicines. We walked in and I saw more plants hanging for drying, and others that were piled along the table. There was one window in the house- one chair, one table, a hearth and a bed. There were other plants in clay pots and jars on shelves.

I was aware that people would come find her in the woods for her medicines and for her Sight. A woman came for medicine and looked wary of being there. She was cloaked, but desperate for the old woman’s help, for the old woman not only worked with plants but very secretly, very carefully and covertly worked in other ways- in the other realms. Her Grandmother had taught her the ways of the forest, the Old Ways, the Spirit of the Plants and the ways of healing with the Earth. She was so pleased to learn and thought her Grandmother the most powerful and kind of all people. Her Grandmother handed her Rosemary- something very important, a pausing, a way of remembering. This was for her to keep for herself, a totem of the Medicine she was teaching her, the same way her Grandmother had taught her and so on and so on. The ancestral lineage passed on from many lifetimes. I felt so deeply connected and so grateful. We flashed back to when the old woman was a young woman. She was gathering plants with her Grandmother, walking along the side of small cottage which the two of them shared. She was feeling a deep heaviness and like the plants and the life she was bound to was a burden- She felt like she wanted to marry- she was so angry, so angry at her Mother. Her Mother was gone.

It was hard to look. Her Mother had died in a fire, a witch’s burning. She died with three other women who were also burned;  for practicing her Sacred Medicine. Her Mother had long blonde hair. She watched from the very back of the crowd, cloaked and stood next to her Grandmother. Before the burning was complete, her Grandmother hurried her away, deep into the forest and taught her the Old Ways. She was only about 16 at the time and did not understand everything, for she promised to Never do Harm- something her Mother was accused of, although she never actually caused any harm. All of the cycles of life had become confused all around her. She vowed to stay alone, she felt deeply burdened by this responsibility- to practice the Medicine, what her Grandmother told her was the most important thing. More important than anything else. When she died, there was a woman and a child with her, possibly her own daughter and granddaughter. As she took her last breath she turned to face the single window of the house and focused on the doe just outside. As she took her last breath, she saw nothing but the doe.

The bound agreement of the burden of the life of a healer, the obligation of healing, the solitude, and the vow to Never do Harm manifested into thick jungle vines. They wove themselves around me, around my torso and began to tighten like a vice. It was hard to breathe. The well woman gave me a ball of light in each hand to cut the vines, and with this action the Story and the agreements, the burden, the lies, and the confusion withered away dissolving into light.

Then it was me- the Red haired maiden and the Blonde Mother as One- surrounded by all of our Grandmothers from the well woman and her Grandmother and her Grandmother and so on and so on- the circle around us was grand indeed. My crown was made of roses and rosemary, and the White Raven came and rested on my left shoulder. I was washed clean.”

I will say, the following week after this blessing I sat down in meditation and the White Raven came back- this time flying into my womb and settling in for the long haul. It has not left me since. Thank you for this opportunity for deep connection with myself, with my ancestors, and with those to come.

Blessings and Love, Kristen

I hope we can all come to a place of being able to offer the gifts of our lineage and ancestral folklore with love and trust again. Thank you Kristen for sharing your Swan story and your dream.

Vow of the Priestess to Separate Body from Spirit

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"I am naked under the gaze and protection of the stars. I am stargazing, star bathing, star being. Filled with the light, and energy and knowing of the stars. They move into me, touching me, illuminating me and the map, the mystery, the way, connecting me to my story, my songs, my dance, my medicine. As my blood returns to source, source fills me in return, with the dreaming and visions that will hold me during my growth, my woman years. I am star clan, star dreamer and star weaver."

I'm always honoured to sit with people in their ancestral journeys in Swan Blessing sessions. I am not only holding space, I am listening intently, learning, travelling with and being taught about the ancient ways of each ancestral lineage. Because not only is ancestral clearing about releasing vows and beliefs the biggest gift and point to the work is to see and remember times when our ancestors lived in great connection to the earth and where respect for her cycles was woven into everything they did. Living life as a ceremony. I had the pleasure of sharing such a journey with Sarah who came to clear a vow, a memory in her lineage of a lifetime as a a priestess living in this beautiful way and then witnessing the destruction of this time of sacred living. A vow so strong that it created a separation between body and spirit. Her journey took her back to her most ancient of ancestors, the star clans, the star grandmothers and she was reminded of that she will always be a child of the stars, she will always have ways of finding her way home. When Sarah came out of her journey she looked up at the painting you see above, an original artwork by artist and fellow forest-dweller, Nadia Turner that hangs in our healing space as quiet guardian and was amazed to recognise her from her own journey and ancestral lineage.

"In the clearing we gather. In the clearing we work, laugh, play and connect to source, to her. The earth underneath our bare feet is soft, cushioned by leaf fall from the tall trees that guard our homes, which lie on the flat stone plateau. The trees are known to us. We listen to them, talk to them, understand their wisdom and offerings. We are in constant exchange with them, air, shelter, shade, fruit, and our own prayers and tending in return. 

I move through time, through the ages watching myself in this place of sacred connection. As a child I walk with my father through the forest, listening to his songs and chants. He takes me to the place where the grandmothers dwell so that I may learn from them. Learn about the plants, the herbs, their gifts, protections and poisons. Life and death are close allies too.

At my first blood I am taken by the women to the bleeding place, and then left. They leave me to journey here alone with the trees and the stars. I am naked under the gaze and protection of the stars. I am stargazing, star bathing, star being. Filled with the light, and energy and knowing of the stars. They move into me, touching me, illuminating me and the map, the mystery, the way, connecting me to my story, my songs, my dance, my medicine. As my blood returns to source, source fills me in return, with the dreaming and visions that will hold me during my growth, my woman years. I am star clan, star dreamer and star weaver.

Older, much older now. I am sitting in the cave of the Grandmothers, feeling the warmth of their wisdom and knowing. They are deep in the belly of the cave, while I sit at the entrance, with my fire and a pot filled with leaves. Smoke from the fire merges with the potent steam from the pot, the small clay pot that was once my mothers, and hers before her. Another woman is with me, inhaling the scent, and the healing of the steam. The spirits speak to her through smoke, cleansing and healing. I hold her hands .

We are not such a large group, 50 or so people living here with the trees, the plants, the forest animals, and with earth, water, fire, and air. We are strong in our bonds to each other, and other local clans. We are strong in our connection to source. We have lived like this for a long time, a long time. We know how to listen.

But my listening troubles me now. I hear a noise in the forest that I do not know, I sense fear in the animals, and even the trees. I ask the grandmothers. The Grandmothers see a time of pain, a time of estrangement and loss. A loss greater than we have ever known, but they seem to wait for it. I am upset and angry, even though they reassure me that we will remember, that the stars will call us home again. But when and how and what is coming?

I know soon enough. Soon enough I see them coming on horseback, coming with a ferocity we have not experienced. Hooves pounding, earth and dust flying, shouts and screams from them and us mingle into a horrifying scream. They come only to destroy, There is no regard for our rules, our ways, they come to trample and burn. Fire our ally, is turned against us, and they on horseback ride through our homes, alighting everything that will burn. Trees, ancient trees burn with my people, burn with the animals and the bodies of the young, the old, the all. Death is everywhere. Death is.

I am alone now, howling and grieving, and raging, and lost. I am a survivor only by there doing, one to witness the destruction, and to tell of their victory, their ways, their story. I will not tell their story, I will not tell their story and I will not priestess again. I will not. Not now, not ever. The temple of our lives is gone, the wisdom and knowing is gone and although my body lives on, my spirit is gone too. 

How long did I wander in the wilderness, scraping an existence, scraping something called life together? I wanted death, I wanted destruction but I was alive . Seven years passed before I saw daughters again, before I saw daughters of another clan, sowing seeds, preparing what they knew. I should have been overjoyed, I should have helped them, But I was not and I did not. I was not going to help create that which could so easily be destroyed again. I had made my vow, and I would keep it. I cut myself off from the wisdom that remained in the trees, the earth, the water, the fire and the stars. I even turned my back on the stars. And this turning away from, this cutting off from has been so very painful. In this life I have sought to reconnect with the source of all, to be held in the deep embrace of the earth mother, to refind myself as an earthling, a wild one, she who knows…and yet I have stumbled through the pain and separation of activism to the joy of my embodied dance work, but still I have been caught in the illusion of separation, still disembodied.  My work with the school of Shamanic Womancraft was a deep resurgence of all that I knew, and all that I had to trust. It was a huge part of my healing, and still I stumbled to trust my medicine, to trust my gifts. 

So this is my story. And through the swan blessing I realised that the vow I had made meant that I had cut myself off from my people, my ancestry, my knowing. I had separated body and spirit. I had in fact chosen to live the story of the oppressor, separating myself from source, just as they said was true. This story of separation is with us now, embedded in the culture in which we live today , and for many years I have been trying to reclaim a way home, to my body, and the body of earth, to integration with and to source. 

And although I went looking for my medicine instread and for me more profoundly I found a way home, a way back to my clan, my heritage, to source. After releasing my bindings and my vow, the grandmothers welcomed me home. They sang me and carried me home. They had never left, it was I who had left them. But now I am home, singing myself, dancing myself, trusting myself that my medicine is a home coming, a return to earth/star/body/spirit. And the messages keep coming, the grandmothers, the animals, the spirits are guiding me.

Towards the end of the swan blessing, I saw a star clan sister on the wall, and in front of me. I was staggered to see a woman from my vision there in a painting. Deep bow to the mystery. My work now is to continue to remember, to reclaim my heritage and to listen again to the wisdom of the heavens and the earth. I have had many beautiful conversations with the earth since then. A spontaneous swim with dolphins in the sea, visits by birds, feathers and of course the stars. My work now is to listen again to the songs of the trees, the earth and my people, to deepen my connection to my clan and this blessed earth. 

I am home."  Sarah 2016 

Thank you Sarah for sharing your Swan story here with us, your words are a poem to remind us all of how we used to live and how to recreate this sacred life again. You can explore Sarah's beautiful offerings of circles embodying the women's mysteries and earth wisdom through dance and movement at Embodiments Dance - Sarah Miller

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Swan Blessing Story - the Wisdom of Listening

Today at this full moon lunar eclipse, I share Sharon's Swan Blessing ancestral medicine story of being the 'listener' in her tribe. In our circles and communities so many different skills are needed and the gentle and compassionate ones, the listeners, can teach so much about hearing each other and listening to the earth. Sharon also told me how she was planning to move away, to begin a whole new time in her life but found it very hard to leave her son to follow her heart even though he was an adult and happy in his life - something held her back.

"I never saw myself as a healer.  I felt I had no special gifts. My Swan Blessing past life session showed me that it does not need to be complicated and I do not need to judge my gifts.  That sometimes the most simple things like listening, understanding and compassion, can be the most powerful healing of all."

"I knew today would be a very special day for me.  I did not know how … I just knew. Though I was still unsure if I was capable of receiving the gifts of balance and connection I wished for.  I mean, I had only journeyed once before and visualisation is not one of my strengths.  I had nothing to fear or doubt, as Julia guided me every step of the way with her beautiful, calming voice … all the while wrapped in the beautiful wings of Swan.

Still unsure if I would be able to journey to find answers or vows from my past, I closed my eyes as Julia guided me into a beautiful forest … the forest of my heart.  I felt so safe and loved.  I was guided to a beautiful waterfall, behind of which was a large calm pool.  There was a face slowly coming to the surface.  She was a beautiful elder in her late 60’s with flowing grey hair and ice blue eyes, which looked straight into mine and through to my heart.  This was me!

I saw her in her homeland.  The land was flat for miles around, with many mountains in the distance, and she was sitting near a river.  She was talking to the river, asking it to take away that which she no longer needed.  She sat there for a long while … they understood each other, the river and her.  She was well loved by her tribe and others came to her often for guidance and healing.  She would hold both their hands and listen to their fears, problems and concerns.  She took their fears and replaced them with her gentle, loving energy.  She then went down to the river, to let everything go, so that they and she would be at peace once more.  This was healing at its most simple … but also most powerful.

Julia took me back further, to where this beautiful woman (me) was a child and walked me through different stages of her life until she went back to spirit.  She was a happy little girl, who spent many hours with her loving grandmother, who passed on her unconditional love and wisdom.  Her grandmother made her a little doll, which she took everywhere with her.  As she grew, her girlfriends used to make fun of her for still taking her doll with her everywhere.  It didn’t matter though, because her doll held her medicine and they would never be apart.  She became the mother of a beautiful baby boy.  Their bond was so strong and she felt like her heart would burst with love for him.  He grew into a wonderful young man and she was asked by the Chief of the tribe to make a vow/decision.  A decision to let her son go.  To let him go and fight for their tribe.  Her faith was strong and she agreed.  Her beloved son was killed, defending one of his friends during the fighting.  She never saw him alive again.  She became withdrawn and went to live in a cave, away from the tribe and the many memories there.  Her heart was broken.  She still had her doll, but it was in the corner of the cave … it no longer was by her side.  One day she took her doll to the river and let it go.  As she watched the river take it away, she felt totally lost.  Her life had no purpose and she returned to the cave for many years.  She did move back to the tribe, using the wisdom from her pain and grief to assist others.  Once again she held both their hands and spoke gently to their heart, while looking into their eyes.  While surrounded by her tribe, she passed to the spirit world … still with a broken heart and the guilt that caused it.

Julia took me back to the pool, where I held this beautiful grey haired woman with the broken heart.  The one who looked at me with such love and such sadness.  I held her so tight and felt the grief that consumed her.  I told her that she could not have prevented her son’s death, that it was his journey and his alone.  That her faith and her medicine was not the cause of his death.  That I would take away her sadness, her guilt and her grief … that she was free.  Her sadness, guilt and grief wrapped itself around my chest in the shape of barbed wire.  But I was strong … I knew that I could release myself from this, which in turn would release the beautiful grey haired woman … the woman that was me.  The Water Witch from the pond reached up and gave me a pair of cutters.  I could do this … I could release this once and for all.  I cut the wire that surrounded my chest, that wire which held me back from healing and loving once more.  It quickly unspun … disintergrating, along with all the grief, guilt and pain.  She was free … we were free … I was free!  She saw her grandmother and her son walking towards her.  Last I saw her, she was walking hand in hand with them.  Spirit never dies.

As I spoke with Julia, after an amazing healing from my grandmothers, my Goddess, my grandfathers, my animal totems and guides, my angels, ancestors and elders … I saw areas of my life where this vow/decision had showed up.  I have the most amazing son, whom I adore and who lives in Tasmania.  I also have a wonderful partner, who lives in SW Queensland.  I have struggled over the last 6 to 12 months, to decide if I move to be with my son or follow my heart to be with my partner.  It was this fear of letting my son go and trusting that no harm would come to him that was holding me back.  Was I going to make the wrong decision?  Trying to make that decision continued to cause me heartache, grief and guilt.  I love my son more than life itself and have always bought him up to live his own life … to do what is right for him.  However, I was unable to apply this to myself.  After my session with Julia I knew that it was time for me to love myself and trust that the move to be with the man I love is right.  And to trust that my son is living his own unique journey.

Last night, I was drawn to become the keeper of Julia's Butterfly Sister Witch Medicine Doll.  Despite her being the most beautiful doll, there was something about her that embodied so many of my loves and my fears.  Butterfly Sister is my connection … she is my little doll who I let go down the river … she has come back to me.  No longer am I lost … I am home.

I never saw myself as a healer.  I felt I had no special gifts.  My Swan Blessing past life session showed me that it does not need to be complicated and I do not need to judge my gifts.  That sometimes the most simple things like listening, understanding and compassion, can be the most powerful healing of all.

Thankyou just does not seem enough.  I knew today would be special.  What I didn’t know, was just how special or life changing it would be.  Still wrapped in the beautiful, loving arms of Swan."  Sharon, 2016

It was a pleasure and honour to journey with Sharon and I remembered as we journeyed that Sharon had also attended a medicine doll circle the year before. How beautiful to discover that the medicine of doll making had been with her all along. Here is a photograph of the doll Sharon made in the circle -  and a confirmation of the ancestral story that was yet to be remembered. I'm sure there will be many more medicine dolls to pass through the hands of 'the listener' in the future.

Swan Blessing Ancestral Ceremony and Doll Making Circle - 9th April, Melbourne (details)

Book a personal Swan Blessing session with Julia

Adelina's Mariposa - Dia de los Muertos

Late last year I received a request from a beautiful Mexican family to create a medicine to hold the ashes of their beloved mother and grandmother, Adelina. I was very happy to create this doll for Daisy, Adelina's daughter who I had come to know through her sister-in-law, Dawn, another beautiful soul who has gifted us with many beaded Huichol treasures for our dolls over the last year. And so I knew that Daisy's dear mother was dying and how much this was a sacred time for her, how she took on the role as carer and wise guardian to walk her mother through the threshold of death and rebirth of her spirit. I was also honoured to be invited into this family and their beautiful Mexican ancestry and wisdom in honouring of the dead.

Yesterday it was my birthday and today in America where Daisy lives and Mexico where Adelina was born it is still February 15th. The link between birth and death is so strong, if felt like the right time to write this story.

I knew that one day, I would be asked to make a doll to such as this. But when it finally arrived I began to get nervous - what if this was too big a job for my skills? Could I really do this? I took this request on with love but also a lot of deep breathing. I don't have anyone around me to teach me to do this, I thought but then I've always felt the presence of my own grandmother and ancient grandmother spirits when I work and so I just had to trust that they would show me the way.

I wrapped the small parcel of ashes in softest merino wool and created a little altar with special blessed treasure that Daisy had sent to me. And still I waited to begin. I was waiting to feel really ready and strong to do this work that was so important to Adelina's family. The realisation of this importance made it even harder for me to begin. I kept making excuses and I had to admit that I was becoming less confident in my ability to do this well enough for her family. I was also finding it confronting to have someone's ashes, the remnants of their physical body sitting on my doll table. And I waited and waited...

One night I had a dream of running a little store selling all kinds of medicine tools and talismans. At the end of the day it was time to close up and as I was busy rushing around a small group of men dressed in white with embroidery on their shirts began to come and sit in a small circle in the middle of my shop. But I was busy, I had so many things to remember to do to make the shop run well and to close up properly. The men began to chant in a language that I didn't recognise. They began to sing medicine songs. Under a table I noticed a small package of bones. I was so drawn to what the medicine singers were doing and singing but I kept thinking that I didn't have time to stop, I had to lock up the shop.

When I woke up the next morning I knew that these men where either Adelina's ancestors or spirit singers guarding and watching over her and that they were getting frustrated with me for making myself busy with all of my other jobs and avoiding the deep medicine work of creating this doll for Adelina's family. I felt ashamed because they were right! I should have sat with them and listened to their songs, I realised the bones in the dream were a symbol of the sacred ashes I held on my table. I realised I could wait any longer to be ready or know more to begin - I just had to stop running around and start!

I began by making a medicine shawl from a piece of felt gifted to me that was hand dyed with seaweed. I started to see stars and cosmic spirals. I used fibres that were dyed with flowers and I started to feel more and more confident about my own role in being the hands for the grandmothers to do their work. Each night I kept seeing the vastness of the cosmos and I remembered a boulder opal that reminded me of this feeling that I had been keeping for a special doll. At the same time I received hand blown glass bones adorned with flowers and the doll began to form very quickly.

As she was forming in front of my eyes I began to feel such affection and love for Adelina and for her daughter Daisy for all of her trust. One night I worked very late until it was almost dawn. As I worked I felt the air become thick around me and I felt airy movements near my shoulders and arms and it felt like butterflies flying all around the room, all around me. I also heard a strong and clear message to 'look at the date'. I felt it was a message to look at the date of when Adelina had passed from this world and I looked and found a remembrance photo posted by Daisy. When I looked at this photo I couldn't believe it - Adelina and I shared the same birthday. She too had been born on February 15th. It was not the date of death that she wanted remembered by the date of birth. Rebirth! It felt like a big hug, like we were connected in this small way.

Each day I felt Adelina's urgency now to have this doll completed to be a source of comfort to her daughter. The last element was a Monarch butterfly placed on the doll's hand to honour the late night visitors to my doll workshop and perhaps one of Adelina's spirit animals. When I mentioned this to Dawn she said this was significant and that in Spanish the word for butterfly is Mariposa. I knew the medicine had her name now: Adelina's Mariposa - a light spirit to hold the ashes of this beloved mother and grandmother and guardian to watch over and guide her family through their grief and eventually to a place of peace.

After I had sent the doll carrying the sacred ashes across the oceans to be with Daisy where she belonged, I found a photo of Daisy taken beside the altars in Mexico celebrating ancestors on Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead). I was stunned and happy to see that Daisy was wearing a Monarch Mariposa in her crown of flowers.

There really are no accidents. So many more weavings and synchronicities occurred during the making of this most sacred of medicine dolls, Adelina's Mariposa. I was changed after making this doll. I realised that this work is very precious to me and that I could do this work more. I also found that I was dedicating myself in a deeper way now to the practice of medicine doll making and to never forget that the ancestors are always watching, helping and if needed singing in our dreams.

Death is one of our biggest teachers. We cannot turn away or hide from this great mystery and yes it is confronting but also incredibly beautiful. I believe that death teaches us about what is truly important and how to love even more deeply. I send the deepest love and respect to Daisy and Dawn and their combined families. May this precious doll be an anchor to hold you through your grief and give you wings to lift your heart to love again. I thank Daisy for this honour and permission to share her story and for sharing the gentle and beautiful spirit of your mother, Adelina with us all. Happy birthday Adelina.

Swan Blessing Story - Healer's Vow to go Unseen

“No longer tarry in the in-between. In order to heal, you must be seen.” 

Today I share Lori's Swan story of the healer who vowed to go unseen. It's a story that I feel is a tale of remembering how innocent we all really are and how we were born this way. We have an ancient memory of women being punished for using ancestral medicine and healing. A memory and vow such as this can create a fear of our work being misunderstood and so we will find ways to only share our work between friends, only trusting those near and dear to us. We may find it very difficult to advertise our work or put it out in a public way. I find this very sad as it means many artists and healers don't share their gifts with the world. Under the name Swurlygirl, Lori shares the ancient medicine of the wool worker. I have had the pleasure of receiving some of Lori's hand-crafted woollen creations and these talismans are filled with such loving intention. Here is Lori's story of the how she opened the door to share her spirit-filled creations with others again.

Swan Blessing Story

"In 2007 I had been reunited, in a way, with the shamanic path. In all my studies and work, however, I’d always felt a deep fear that kept me closer to the edges of the path rather than walking confidently down the middle. This fear usually made itself known whenever I got closer or deeper into knowing myself - whenever there was talk of “knowing your medicine.”  I pushed onwards and tried to work through the fear. I became the assistant to a shamanic practitioner & teacher ~  however this fear was particularly strong and kept me from stepping any further in. In September 2012, during a shamanic journey to seek healing, I heard these words spoken to me:

“No longer tarry in the in-between. In order to heal, you must be seen.”

This gave me comfort and also terrified me at the same time.  I didn’t really know what to do next, so I kept the words inside, to unpack their medicine another day. That day came in July 2015, with the support of Julia & her Swan Blessing work.

As I listened to Julia’s voice gently directing me,  I came to a forest.  I recognized the land I was walking on ~ every tree and every blade of grass here. I had long golden hair and a long white dress on.  As I moved deeper into the forest, a deeper familiarity came to me as I saw the well and the waterfall.  I knew this place.

When I looked into the well, I saw Baba Yaga - An Cailleach, the wise crone looking back at me. As I looked into her eyes I could see all the faces of her - Her eyes were filled with warmth, looking into mine and I felt sadness and shame.  She took my hand in hers and told me she loved me and that she has always loved me.  Then she took me to where she lived - it was in a craggy paddock that I recognized from a shamanic journey I had done some years ago ~ hilly with bare stone showing through the grass in some parts.  There was a grove of trees beside us.  It was a warm, sunny day and a soft breeze was blowing.

She led me to a big black cauldron with a fire burning beneath it.  She was slowly stirring the cauldron and as she did so, she looked so powerful ~ like the embodiment of wisdom.  I looked into the cauldron and saw she was stirring a thick, dark liquid - like a resin of some kind - an amber coloured resin.  When I asked what the resin did, I felt a heaviness in my belly.  I then saw a woman coming up the hill to see the old crone ~ as she came closer into view, I saw that she was heavily pregnant and was wearing no clothing.  The woman came closer to the cauldron. She was afraid and kept looking over her shoulder that no one should see her there.  The crone took a cup, ladled some of the amber liquid into it and gave it to the woman to drink.  I then saw the woman was no longer pregnant and was a different person living an entirely different life.  Another woman came up the hill - an older woman this time and the amber liquid made her young again. I was shown where the crone slept and lived -  in a small room in a cottage in that forest.  Her bedroom was sparse with a cot, a small dresser and a window that looked out to the forest.  She lived there completely alone ~ no animals, no people, completely quiet.

I then saw the crone as a little girl of 5, with white-blond hair— in a similar woods ~ chasing after butterflies, laughing as she ran.  The animals in the forest - birds, deer ~ all playing with her.  She felt connected to everything and felt known to everything around her. There was no fear.  She understood the language of the world around her and the world understood her.  She  was so deeply happy and innocent.  She lived in a  little house made of stone & timber - she lived there with her grandparents.  When she ran into the house, both her grandfather & grandmother greeted her warmly.  The grandfather was standing at the big wooden table in the kitchen and was preparing vegetables and plants.  The grandmother was sitting across from the table in a big wooden armchair.  She was working some fine handwork embroidery into linen.  They both felt familiar to me - when I looked into their faces I recognized them as the people who had been my Baba & Geja (grandmother & grandfather) in my present lifetime.  My grandmother taught me the handwork and my grandfather taught me the plant work - together they made a talisman from the plants and the embroidered cloth.

The girl’s parents were not here.   I was then shown who they were.  I didn’t recognize the man who was the father, but when I looked into the eyes of the woman who was the mother,  I recognized them to be the eyes of someone I had known in my present lifetime, but am no longer in contact with.  The girl was being raised by her grandparents and taught their ways.

I was then shown the girl at 16.   It was night time in the forest and she was all alone.  She was dressed in black  and standing in the middle of the forest.  She was scared and alert. I could feel her heart beating so strong & fast.  It was dark, but she could see her way in the dark - I couldn’t hear anyone coming, but she knew they would be.  It was the townspeople that would be coming for her.

She showed me that, earlier that day, a very pregnant woman had come to her  seeking some kind of help - and that the girl did what she has been instructed to do to help the woman, however somehow, something appeared to go wrong and the woman, instead, became violently ill.  The girl tried to do what she could, but knew, if the woman’s people came for her, the girl could never explain what happened and that they would not understand if she did try to explain.  She consoled the woman the best she could, kept stroking her face and hair and telling her she was so sorry ~ she kissed the woman on the forehead and then ran into the forest. She could hear them coming and she began to run into the darkness and shape-shifted into a crow.  All I could see then, was a dark void.

I was then shown what had happened to the girl before this night.  She had been cast out of her family, by her people, specifically her mother, for being different from the rest of them.  Her mother, who was very pious in her outlook, did not approve of her daughter &  was afraid of her.  The girl was 15 years old.

I was then shown the young girl, maybe a few years later.  She was in a dirty night dress that looked like it had once been white.  She was inside a stone turret - a prison - alone, with irons on her wrists and her feet.  Her hair had been hacked off and I could hear people outside this place calling her a witch and a killer.  In this place I heard her say “ I will never show myself ever again.  I will never allow myself to seen ever again. “  I felt her cries inside and the deepest sadness.  I was then beside her as she was inside the fire being burned as a witch.  I saw the flames engulf her and she was completely silent.  She then turned into the brightest light and shot upwards to the stars.  She was free.

When I returned to the well, I held the Crone in front of me and breathed the deepest, strongest love into her - I felt all her sorrow melt away and she became bright and beautiful and free.

As she became free, I became bound - bound up so tightly with reams and reams of barbed wire from my ankles to my neck.  The binding was the tightest from my torso to my throat - binding my arms so tightly that I couldn't move them.  I was given a tool by a Daughter of the Well that would cut the binding.  I managed to cut the first bit of binding, then more and more became loosened until my whole body was freed and the bindings disintegrated.

When I received the blessings of the Grandmothers -  I felt all the love of all of my ancestors ~ of all the medicine-keepers of my lineages ~ I felt light and free and full of love, truth and wisdom.  And I felt the peace of my ancestral name, Peace Carrier, so deeply, almost for the very first time.  I felt the words push through my heart:  I am truth.  I am love.  I am wisdom.

That feeling of peace and freedom stayed with me for days after the blessing. There were so many parts of my swan blessing story that I could connect to my present life - situations, things that I have lived through in this life that echo back to the past.  I was amazed at how many things connected to my present day. I was remembering, more clearly, all the time I spent with my maternal grandparents, the ones that I’d recognized in the Swan Blessing.  In this lifetime, my Baba taught me to work with wool and  how to craft with words.  My Geja worked with the earth, among many other things, he was a gardener and a man of plants.  We spent many mornings and afternoons exploring the land and forests around our summer cottage when I was younger.  He taught me about the earth and how to tend a garden.

In this lifetime, my grandparents taught me about the magic that is inherent in life.

The strongest affirmation and most magical thing, however, came shortly after the blessing.  Where I live now is a bit like where the young girl and the crone lived in my swan blessing.  I live on the ground floor of a house on the edge of a forest with many, many ferns, moss, towering cedars, pines and a roaring creek behind me, in the mountains on the west coast of Canada. Above me, lives a family with 2 young boys, aged 4 & 6.  The boys are friendly and whenever we happen to see each other, they like to tell me about their their toys or their mountain-biking adventures.  Usually, in the summertime, they are mostly running around with water guns, dropping water balloons or playing on their trampoline.  As I was writing to Julia a day or two after the blessing, there was a knock on my door.  It was the 6-yr old boy and he asked if he could show me a spell / potion that he was working on and if I could help him. I paused for a long moment because he had NEVER asked me this before, nor had I ever seen him engaged with the plants and the earth like this.  He was very insistent that I knew how to help him.  I broke into a big smile, remembering the Swan Blessing, and nodded my head that I could help him.  He said that it was an exploding spell.  And then he made another one to show me, which was a healing potion and then one potion that would do whatever was needed by what it touched.  That one, he put on the ferns and said that it would now affect ALL the ferns in the whole world AND that we had to program it  - he wanted to program some quite violent things, being a 6-year-old boy - but I convinced him towards a gentler approach ~ much to the relief of the dear ferns.  A few moments later, his mum was calling him in for dinner that was waiting for him, and he ran into the house.  I remained outside for a while ~ staring at the ferns and the forest, that seemed, now,  to be glowing with the most vibrant green life.  This was the work of the Swan Blessing.  I took a moment to say thank you again, to the Swan and the grandmothers, who, through Julia, brought me back to the love, truth and wisdom that I had been parted from so long ago.  And a word of gratitude to the spirit helper who whispered to me years before, “No longer tarry in the in-between. In order to heal, you must be seen.”

I learned, many years ago, that it’s important for our healing, to be able to find something or some way to bring this “otherworldly” medicine into our mundane world.  So a few days after the blessing, I crafted a talisman to honour the work, my story and to help the blessing settle into my bones and ground into my everyday world, a guidepost to hold it all.  Whenever I may feel in doubt or filled with grief,  I sit with this talisman, the tangible reminder of the Swan and her blessing.

This blessing work truly shone a light on the seed of the fear that I have felt for most of my life.   It has been a sometimes slow, but steady process to sweep away so many cobwebs, however, since the Swan Blessing, I have felt a space open up inside of me that continues to grow.  I feel a far greater freedom  and confidence in my wool work - to incorporate word & plant medicine more openly into the creatures I weave, felt, knit, crochet, and stitch. I have also felt less fear in sharing this wool work with others. Some days, the fire that was rekindled within me with the Swan Blessing burns bold and bright and on other days, it’s a little glimmer of a flame in the dark and an inner knowing that I am part of a great, deep flowing magic that I will never be parted from.

Infinities of love & gratitude, Swurlygirl 2016

I'm thrilled that Lori is sharing her gifts as wool worker more and more and setting up a space for herself online where people will be able to see what she does and request their own pieces of Swurlygirl magic. And I'm so happy that Lori knows that every time she creates she is honouring and even visiting with her grandparents again to thank them for all the ancestral medicine they shared with her as a child. Look at these new creations - the child and healer are now one - playing and showing herself again.

Book a personal Swan Blessing ancestral medicine session with Julia.

Singing Home the Ghosted Sister - Swan Blessing ceremony and medicine doll workshop.

Image credit: Imogen Cunningham

Swan Blessing Past Life Story - Vow to Not Use Her Medicine

Very often the vow that comes up to be released in Swan Blessing past life sessions is the vow to close down or reject our personal ancestral medicine. This can be very confusing in our present incarnation as we will still be drawn, and deeply passionate about our medicine but will find it very hard to embrace and share with others - especially if we try and embrace it as our vocation again. It creates pain, confusion and fear of something that should be treasured and celebrated - our natural gifts and power.

Many moons ago I used to teach tarot circles to help others to trust their intuition and to develop their own individual way of reading and sensing messages from the cards. I was always blown away by the beautiful readers who came to develop their gifts with us and I remember these years of sitting in tarot circles very fondly. Recently I was contacted by Candice, a student I remembered well, requesting a Swan Blessing past life session. I remembered Candice so well because she was one of the most naturally gifted readers Tony and I had ever spent time with - a very gifted seer. But there was an internal battle going on within Candice and I could see this too - she was afraid of her gifts.

Candice told me that she had recently begun to offer her service of tarot reading to the public. I was thrilled for her because this has been such a long time coming and she is so good! But she then told me how much anxiety she felt when having to give difficult news to her clients. I explained to her that a reader is merely an interpreter for the cards and that often in our life the difficult times are our biggest teachers and assist huge shifts towards growth. That I am always grateful when my cards inform me that it's time to release an old dream that doesn't serve or that I am about to go through a period of understanding my fears. The reader's role is not to give a sugar-coated sweet reading every time as that would be false and is not a true reflection of life and the sacred circle of birth, death and rebirth that we go through each day just like every cell of our body.

While Candice understood this on a mental level she said she could still feel something very deep and fearful about one day having to be the 'bearer of bad news'.

This is Candice's Swan Blessing story of the past life events that created these old beliefs and fears:

"I decided to have a Swan Blessing to discovering the blocks I have in becoming a tarot reader. For such a long time I had wanted to start my tarot business but could not find the courage to. I had so many fears going into it. I have tried to give tarot up so many times before with many times throwing out my decks, my notes and any books I had on the tarot. But for some reason I keep feeling drawn to it. It’s like a bad habit that I keep being pulled into despite my efforts to stop.

This journey into my Swan blessing was truly a blessing. As I closed my eyes and relaxed I felt the presence of my family, ancestors and spirit guides with me in the room as I went completely within myself. I could feel myself travel back in time.

I was directed to a lake and in this lake I saw a Native American with long black hair, at first I couldn't tell if it was a male or female then I realised it was a young male. He was 24 years old. He was me and I was him. I asked him what is it that is blocking me in reaching my full potential. With a hardness in his eyes he could not tell me like he had shut it off from his heart, instead he took me on a little canoe across the water. He was pointing to the other side of the mountain. He left me on the other side of the river and I walked to the other side of the mountain by myself as he did not want to come.

As I went there and walked on the land it was so hard for me to see what was there. There was so much smoke lingering around. It was all grey and white before me and the tents that remained were just ashy. As I realised who's village this was my eyes filled with tears as I realised that this was my own village. My village was attacked and destroyed.

I was then shown what I did in this life time. I was the seer of the tribe. Elders who held leadership within the tribe came to me for guidance for the tribe. I could not believe that those who were so much older than I held me in such high regard. I used a crystal of some sort to foresee future events. I was guided to see what I saw in that lifetime. I foresaw the tragic event of the destruction of my village long before it happened and I did not tell anyone as I wanted to be wrong and I wanted the best for my people.

When I saw that I actually foresaw the event happening my eyes welled up again and I had such a heaviness in my chest. I felt heartbroken. I felt helpless with so much guilt for what happened. Something that I could have prevented but I didn’t.

As a punishment for myself in that life time I isolated myself from everyone and everything. I lived alone in a cave until I was a very old man and died alone in my cave and I never spoke to anyone again. I never practised any more magic or seer again in that life time as it was too hard for me. I punished myself for what had happened.

My blessing allowed me to be with the man that I was, I told him that this was not his fault and he only wanted the best. I also told him that I will make this right in this life time. I got it. I understood all his fear, pain and sadness because I feel it in my current life time. All the times I read for others all the readings I have sent out the process of when I do readings all of the pain and anxiety was so familiar because it was all mine. The pain I have held onto that long has allowed me to suppress my gifts because I was still too scared to hurt another person.

For such a long time I had all these anxieties when doing readings and everything finally made sense. I had a fear for reading people older than me, I also had a fear when turning over the cards I saw just in case I saw something that was not favourable. I would actually stress for who I am reading for.

Now I have learnt with Julia and this Swan blessing that the not great things I see in a reading can actually be of benefit. Now when I read I have such an inner confidence within me. I feel confident that I am doing exactly what I should be doing and I don't fear the reading like I used to. This doesn’t mean I still don't have normal anxiety but I have an inner knowing that I came here to earth with this ability and to share it. I love my tarot readings and love helping people and now know that I have the ability to do so. And now I will with the confidence that I was actually born to do this!

Thank you Julia for allowing me to go on this journey back to myself. You have given me a gift that I will forever be grateful for. You have given me the confidence to truly believe in my inner strengths and abilities from lifetimes before. A confidence of knowing my true abilities and purpose and why I am here. Forever grateful to you and your gifts. Thank you."

Candice 2016, The Blessed Path Within

I am thrilled to hear Candice speak and write these words. Her gifts are beautiful and she brings such insight and clarity to her readings and now she can share them with a strong and open heart.

It is a terrible feeling to be withholding our natural gifts - to be afraid of our personal medicine. I'm very happy to see that there is a new respect and opening at this present time for the holding of circle together, ceremony and the intuitive arts. We are learning to break through our fears and release old beliefs that do not fit or belong to us in this time and often our biggest fear is our own power. I thank the great grandmothers who come to assist us in Swan Blessing, they remind us all that not too long ago our ancestors used and shared their medicine with love.

Bookings for Swan Blessing sessions with Julia 

Image: Medicine drum from 'Shapeshifting : Transformations in Native American Art' - Peabody Essex Museum

The Witch's Daughter - Past Life Vow to Remain Alone

Witches' Wood by Bertrand H. Wentworth

Swan Blessing is the past life and ancestral healing work that I began 7 years ago to help clear and heal the memories and ancestral trauma of the 'burning times' upon our ancestors and ourselves. The memory or soul loss created by witnessing events where women have been persecuted for simply being healers and connected to the earth and her plants or even carrying these memories from our ancestors in our DNA can create many kinds of problems in our present lives. The most common feeling is anxiety, but it can also manifest as a kind of sensation of being stuck and unable to move because in a way we remember what happened to the women who stood out, were different. The biggest crime of all is that it has conditioned us to believe it is safer to stay on the edge of the 'mystery', to never step back through the veil. 

Today I share Alex' Swan Blessing story of the witch's daughter and her vow to remain alone. When I read this story in full it had a profound effect on me because she was speaking from the heart about issues that were so personal and painful for her. I loved her retelling and the honesty, the raw guts and all approach to her life! Thank you Alex for reminding me that this journey with the collective is also personal and individual - we cannot compare it to anyone else's experience and the worst thing we can do is try to 'fit in'. Alex is also speaking honestly about the healing process and how it is often like peeling layers away - good and deep healing takes time. Most importantly I am so happy to see that now Alex is alone when she chooses to be alone and that she is MAGNIFICENT! 

With her story also came gifts of healing water gathered at the Fairy Pools on the Isle of Skye in Scotland where she was the only one crazy enough that day to swim in those freezing waters and from the Chalice Well in Glastonbury. When Alex arrived for her session I didn't know that she was about to embark on this journey, but as soon as she chose tarot cards from the Gaian Tarot by Joanna Powell Colbert (an amazing deck that I find perfect for past life work) her destination was right there in front of her in vivid colour. The cards asked Alex 'are you going to always sit on the edge of the mystery daughter? How long can you keep yourself apart, a step away from joy?' Here is her answer.

Swan Blessing reading with the Gaian Tarot before Alex journeyed with the Swan

"This has taken me a while to write. Soon after my Swan Blessing with Julia, I wrote some notes to remember my encounter. But to write it out fully, is to release it. And I haven’t been ready to do that. Until now. I very much enjoy wallowing in my pain and misery, observing it, letting it twist my insides until my anxiety levels peak. It’s quite sadistic, I know. But I learn from it, as long as I acknowledge it. Which takes a while. After I wallow, I ignore all the self-inflicted pain and become destructive until I am ready to face the truth. I am a big advocate of 'ignorance is bliss'. Yet the problem is, this no longer works for me. I know too much, have felt too much to be ignorant to my desires, passions and ultimately the light and dark of my being. Which was why I went to see Julia.

I arrived at Julia's home on the second day of spring, full of promise, hope, doubt and a little worried. Throughout the year, I have been doing a lot of soul searching, trying to understand my nature, patterns I repeat and my shadow aspect which I have a tendency to either deny or let consume me. I was going to Julia to seek answers. When she explained to me that sometimes vows or promises made in past lifetimes have the ability to affect us in this lifetime, my immediate reaction was "shit... I reckon I did some pretty crazy shit in my previous lives". But Julia's calming voice let me break away from my fears and feel the love and energy of my spirit guides and ancestors.

After I selected cards from a tarot deck, Julia was able to explain to me the vow I had made was having a major impact on my relationships in this lifetime. This was very accurate, as I do struggle to connect to others on a higher level as well as letting certain patterns destroy my relationships. However, the next card was the one that really hit me. It was a young girl sitting on the edge of the Chalice Well, a famous spiritual site in Glastonbury, England. Like the girl, spiritually, I had always found myself on the edge. Never delving in, never committing, yet interested and informed. Not being able to let go and experience spirituality had there caused me much sadness throughout my life, contributing to feeling like an outsider. What made this card particularly interesting, was that in approximately a month, I was travelling to the UK, so making the journey to the Chalice Well was at the top of my must see list. The final card was the Sun which showed a girl surrounded by sunflowers, dancing, with a beautiful, happy and knowing smile. I saw myself in that girl and instantly I wanted that version of me. I didn’t want to wallow and pity myself anymore. Nor self-destruct,hurt myself and others or waste my life away in ignorance. I wanted to release the vow I made, one so strong, it hid, forcing me to go deep within. One that I have carried through lifetimes, letting it affect me and even feeding it at times. But not anymore. This time I am going to let it go.

The first thing I see are green eyes. Green eyes peering at me in a pool of clear water. I try to reach to the creature with the engaging green eyes. But they disappear. I call to them again and this time they appear with a nose. But they still will not leave the pool, the safety. They are willing to let me in, but they will not come out. I must go deeper for this journey. As I break through the veil of the pool onto the other side, I find myself in a partially dried river bed, in a beautiful valley surrounded by trees, standing next to a girl of about 8 years old. She has straw coloured hair and is dressed in a filthy white woollen shift. As she turns to look up at me, somewhat defiant yet also grateful, I see that the eyes match the green eyes I saw in the pool. She still will not let me approach her, but she allows me to follow her so she can show me. I follow her along the river bank, watching her as she stops sporadically to pick something up, throwing stones into the river here and there and occasionally checking that I do not get too close to her. I ask her where her family are.

She speaks to me without opening her mouth, in what I can only describe as telepathically. She tells me that she is alone. She is upset but she looks into my third eye and shows me what happened to her family. I am not myself, I am her. I feel all her fear and horror as people surround her house, yelling and shouting, calling out to her mother. I can see my (her) mother standing in the corner shielding my brother, a toddler who is crying. The people around the house are yelling a number of things, directed at my mother such as“Heretic”, “Witch”, “Whore” and“Slut”. The mob burnt the house to the ground. Yet I was not in it. I am not sure how or why, but I was somehow watching the house burn from above.

I feel all her loss, pain and anger at losing her family. As the girl pulled me back to myself, she explained that she had been living in the valley on her own, taking care of herself. I ask her to show me happier times with her family and what it was like before they took them away. Again, I am forced into her consciousness. I see my mother, who radiated love and cared for me so much. The love I felt towards my mother, emanating from my small form was some of the purest, most joyful love I have ever felt. My mother was a medicine woman or hedge witch, who showed me how to make healing poultices, use healing plants and hunt and trap animals for food. I had no father. I played with my little brother and took him to the garden when people would come to see my mother. The same people who would kill her. Young women would come for love or fertility, and men for healing and virulence. To the child and to me she was the absolute embodiment of the divine feminine. The perfect balance of feminine and masculine. She was womanly and gentle with unbleached skin and light auburn hair with big blue eyes like sapphires.While these people used her for her services, they were always wary and scared of her. I could feel my child’s mind unable to understand, because the way I saw her as beautiful, loving and caring. She was pure. The people who used her were troubled and scared of everything including themselves.

illustration John D Batten

I was thrown forward in time and I was still the girl but a little older, around 14 years old. I slept in a large tree at night to keep warm. I was able to hunt for myself and find any herbs, vegetables or plants that I needed. I was ultimately a recluse, withdrawing form human contact as much as I possibly could. She wanted me to see that we could take care of ourselves. That we didn’t need to rely on others. As I acknowledged this fact, I was thrown forward again to a time where I was approximately 20 years old. I was walking through the middle of a small town or village. The people that I walked past, mostly in a market place, stopped what they were doing to gawk at me. Some were whispering, few knew who I was. Others could feel or sense the power that was emanating from me, swirling around me, threatening to consume them if they dare approach. My destination was a hall which sat on a hill just above the village. The only way I can describe my thoughts while I was walking through the village was “NO FUCKS GIVEN.” I did not care what these people thought of me, what they said to me or about me. I was fucking magnificent, powerful and most of all, I knew it. I was there for a purpose.

As I approached the hall and opened the doors to enter, my eyes locked with a man in a large chair, someone who was clearly in charge. He knew who I was and I knew who he was. He was my father. And he had had my mother and brother killed. Whatever his reasons or intentions, I did not care. I stared at him until his gaze fell, possibly in recognition of who I was or in acceptance of what was about to happen. And then I cursed him. I cannot remember the exact words (probably a good thing) but they were similar to “I curse you and all your seed. Your line will begin and end with me. All you love, have ever loved and all you touch will turn to dust and fade. You will be nothing. You are nothing." The pure anger, hatred and vengeance was like nothing I had ever felt. At times I can be a vindictive person who will hurt others because they have hurt me, but this was next level. In this lifetime I was willing to sacrifice myself to hurt another person. To take away everything that mattered to him, because he had taken away the only thing that I cared about. My vow and the sacrifice I made for the curse was to be alone forever. I had lost the only thing that mattered and rather than try to find solace and acceptance, other people to care for, I chose hateful vengeance and a solitary life. I was shown a brief glimpse of the rest of my life, which was not overly long. I had a number of lovers and seduced anyone I could, with no acknowledgement of the pain I caused to people that had never hurt me. I bore children and in a way discarded them, found no joy in them, regarded them as a hindrance. And so I was always alone. I didn’t care for anyone.

Many years later, I went back to the village of my father. They eventually bound me in chains and placed me in a jail of some sort. In some way, I knew that my father was dying or very ill. I was at the end of my journey, the hate and rage had become exhausting and it was nearly over. I knew that to capture and kill me, despite the curse would give my father a measure of peace in his after life. So in my last act of defiance I pulled a vial of poison out from between my breasts, took the dram in one long swig and died with a smile on my lips because I had won. I had sacrificed my own peace to take away someone else’s.

Once again, I was standing in the valley beside the river bed, with the young woman who had placed the curse in front of me. As I looked at her, my eyes filled with tears and my whole body became tense, making me feel like I had been winded. I begged her to embrace me, to release the anger, hatred and the vow that held us both. She refused me. Who was I to tell her what to do? How could I make her release when no one else could? What happened next, was like some telepathic exchange where I explained that I knew how she felt, I had just seen it, I was also bound by her hatred. I pleaded with her once more and hesitantly she embraced me and then collapsed in to my arms. All the sadness, sorrow, hatred and pain left her, filtered into me and she became light as a feather. Before she was beautiful because she was fearsome. Now she beautiful because she was happy. She could be finally be with her mother and brother. They were standing there waiting for her, like they always had been. As she hugged me goodbye, thanked me and went to her family, all her emotions consumed me and bound me in vines from my feet to my neck. As they constricted and suffocated, this was the time I knew I could not wallow in my self-hatred and pity. I searched for anything to break me free from these constricting vines and found a dagger made of bone. As I began to hack away at the vines piece by piece, I could feel the tension in my body begin to ease, the anxiety slip away. I felt the hatred, vengeance and pain fall away with every vine. I cut through the curse and the vow and felt my body release generations of pain. I was free.

A month after I had my Swan Blessing, I journeyed to the UK. I went with a heart and head full of the excitement, knowledge and hope I had gained. And you know what? I was disappointed. I arrived in London expecting to be this amazing, free person, yet I still wasn’t. To be honest, after seeing Julia I did a little bit of work on myself but other than immediately after the blessing I didn’t feel significantly different. I thought it would all make sense when I left, when I escaped from everything I knew. I expected an instant fix. I saw friends in London and Liverpool and travelled to Glasgow on my own, waiting every moment for this 'epiphany' to happen. To let go of all my bullshit, to release my vow, to be as free as that girl in the sun, the one who had cut all the vines. Instead I was homesick. I was in a country I had wanted to travel to virtually my entire life and I was fucking homesick!? What the hell was wrong with me? Where was this magical realisation and cure all for me being a fucked up mess? Feeling quite dejected I continued on. I hired a car and drove through the Scottish Highlands, to the Isle of Skye, Inverness and back down to Edinburgh. I marvelled at the enormity of the highlands, the vast meandering emptiness that also felt so full of life with a sparkle in my eyes and a grin on my face. I forced myself out of my shell, talking to the travellers, asking their advice and picked up a hitchhiker who I travelled to Skye and Inverness with. I climbed mountains, stood on cliffs and swam in the Fairy Pools. I went searching for the Northern Lights of Inverness, driving along winding roads that felt so tiny and foreign. I stood on the banks of Loch Ness, with a song in my heart and picked a thistle for my one true love.

During this time, I forgot that I was waiting for this 'epiphany'. I forgot that I needed a cure for being a mess, for being sensitive and cruel at the same time. It wasn’t until I was back in London and had a little down time that I remembered how important the Chalice Well had been to me. So I hired a car and drove out to Glastonbury, stopping at Stonehenge on the way. After arriving in Glastonbury late, I left early the next morning to drive towards Tintagel Castle and Cornwall. Due to lack of planning, I missed the opportunity to explore Merlins Cave. Pissed off, I hiked up a ridiculous amount of stairs against the tearing wind to look at some bloody rocks that form what was once a castle. I kept going, marvelling at the wildness of the country, avoiding massive slugs and goats that are apt to chase people. When I had reached a peak, I sat down partially from exhaustion, part memory and part sadness. I stood up and looking down at the ferocious sea, I screamed into the wind, yelling at the goddess, at god, at myself, daring the wind to become powerful enough to knock me into the sea and let it consume me. With a raw throat, salt stained face and teary eyes, I walked back to the car.

I had one more stop before I could finally go to the Chalice Well, and that was St. Nectan's Glen which I thought looked like a cool waterfall. Once I arrived, I started to walk along the path hurriedly as I just wanted to get a photo and get back in the car so I could make it to see the Chalice Well before it closed. Yet I kept walking. And walking. And bloody walking! Rather than taking in the beauty around me, I was hurrying. When I finally reached the entrance I walked down to the waterfall and I was on my own in this haunting glen. It felt like there was no one around for miles. Like I was the only soul left alive. I admired the ribbons hanging from trees, small piles of flat stones and the rushing water from the beautiful keyhole waterfall. I sat for a moment and contemplated whatever people contemplate in places such as this and then I stood up, took my clothes off and waded into the water and stuck my head under the freezing waterfall. Because why not?

I finally made it to the Chalice Well gardens that afternoon (after taking forever to find a park in tiny English streets, being yelled at for smoking too close to the gardens and scolded for coming towards closing time). I walked the gardens, took photos and drank the water which apparently has healing properties. By the time I came to the actual Well, I sat and cried. Not from sadness or happinessbut from acknowledgement. Sitting by it, I can’t honestly say if it was 'welling' with the spirits and powers of ancient magicks. I was too consumed in myself and my 'epiphany' moment. The Chalice Well was a reminder of how far I had come since sitting in the room in the forest with Julia and discovering my vow, my strength and my darkness.

Despite making the vow to be alone and being afraid of it all my life, I learned it is okay to be a recluse at times in order to recharge and to do things on your like driving through Scotland. That like the little girl from my Swan Blessing, I can take care of myself, without reliance on others, what they think of me and their opinions on how I conduct my life. I realised that I am FUCKING MAGNIFICENT, even if I don't feel that way all the time and that while being born a woman, a cause of pain and frustration in many ways, is such a blessing that I need to own it and be proud of being this fucking divine. I don't need to constantly test people nor do I have to win all the time, as it is okay to let go sometimes. I acknowledge that I don't need to rush all the time, sometimes the universe is just screaming for you to take your time. Most importantly I realised that I am deserving of love and so much more.

While these might not sound like things worthy of a major realisation, these are issues that I have faced throughout my life. While I visualised cutting away the vines that day in the forest, they were never completely gone. Cutting the vines did not release my vow, but gave me the power to release it. However it doesn't come quickly. You release parts and pieces, acknowledging and bidding farewell. They will try to come back repeatedly (a bit like John Farnham) but you know better now. They're transparent and you are no longer ignorant. You won't let the vines creep up on you again. Whilst I understand not everyone can go on a journey like I did so soon after having their blessing, you don't need to. You have been awoken. You have seen your lightness and possibly your darkness. It won't come as easy as you think or will it come quickly and you will spend a long time keeping those vines at bay. But it's worth it. Because you're no longer happy to sit by in ignorance and bliss. Take the pain and harsh realisations because it is all worth it in the end.

I would like to thank Julia for not only the Swan Blessing but also the help and advice she has given me in the past. I have learnt that I don't need to hold on to things to make them true. I need to release them so that I am able to live."

Alex Walker, 2016

Book a Swan Blessing session with Julia

Photos by Alex Walker

Medicine Doll Story - RavenKeeper of Secrets

Crow SecretKeeper

A handblown glass vessel to catch tears. RavenKeeper of Secrets travels with her mama, a healer working with women & children in shelters and halfway houses. She is doll for them to tell their stories to when they are not ready or able to speak to anyone else.

In May this year I travelled to the Redwoods in California to share medicine dollmaking at Spirit Weavers Gathering. It was a beautiful experience to sit with sisters so far from my home in Australia and humbling too when I heard their stories about the deep and passionate work they are committed to doing. I especially loved catching up with sisters that previously I'd only spoken to online. Once of these women was Heidi Lafinier who I knew as Pura Vida Living and I was so happy when she sat beside me in one of our medicine doll circles. As we began Heidi mentioned that she had noticed how many of my dolls had braided hair and I told her it wasn't conscious it just felt right. She told me that in her Native American Cree tradition, braiding your hair was a way to preserve energy for yourself. To keep it strong and pure. She said just putting a small braid in your hair can help you from being affected by the energy of others - keeping your spirit close so you can work with other people who may be in pain and trauma and not have their energy affect you so much. I was very grateful to learn this and it really seemed to speak to the similar medicine of wool as an insulator, incubator, a holder of energy. Wool also is one of the few fibres that does not easily take in water -  just like our hair.

Fire Elemental Sacred Familiar

After I returned to Australia I made the Fire elemental medicine doll you see above and Heidi felt called to be her keeper. This doll told Heidi her name was Bold and she began to go everywhere with Heidi in her work with women and children in shelters and halfway houses. As a healer and grandmother herself, Heidi's passion is working with the Crone. Soon I received another request from Heidi for a new doll, a special doll and when I asked why, this is the story that Heidi shared with us to call in the spirit of RavenKeeper of Secrets:

"I have volunteered at the battered women's shelter and a halfway house for women just released from prison to perform Reiki.  I always take Bold and keep her with me, but on one occasion at the women's shelter a red haired little girl asked if she could hold Bold while I gave her mom Reiki, I saw no harm in this.  As her mom and I walked back into the room we overheard this: "And that's really how my arm was broken, thanks Bold I will tell the Police the truth now.  I love you too!"   She gave me Bold and we went home.

Bold didn't talk to me on the way home or at work the next day but I was busy and let it go, but after work we were off to the halfway house. These women are very hard or hardened.  I offered Reiki to one woman and another asked about the doll I kind of explained her and tried to hurry on, every red flag in my body said keep moving, she was someone I'd been warned about (hard, mean, hateful, violent etc.). But she said "I would like to talk to that doll while you do hanky panky to her" and she pointed to the other women.  I really did not want to give Bold to her, but Bold still wasn't really talking to me, so I handed Bold to her and I finished Reiki and rushed out to get Bold and it was like a different lady handed me back my doll.  And these are her exact words: "That is some doll, first person who ever believed me, and I have been telling the truth for 35 years"  and she turned around and walked away.  I stood there like an idiot.  On the way home Bold still didn't talk but that night I decided I should sage and cleanse her, but she spoke loudly then and said maybe you should meditate with me first!  Then she didn't betray any confidences but she let me see that she was not made to be a 'Keeper of Secrets'  she was there for me and she would always help me, but it was hard on her to take the pain of those she did not know, pain that was so indescribable she could not share with me.  Because she was my keeper.  So I helped cleanse her and we are whole again.

So I now Know, I need a medicine doll whose sole purpose is to be strong as steel, who can be the 'KEEPER OF SECRETS'.  This is something I believe I will come in contact with many times as I begin working with the Crones.  There are two very wise spirit animals that are considered Keepers of the Secrets.  One is the Lynx and one is the Raven.  The Owl is also related to secrets or the darkness of things.  None of these are bad as Creator only created good things for us."

RavenKeeper of Secrets

I felt such strong emotions reading Heidi's story and request. It's stories like these that remind me of the power of the doll. How many times have we seen children talking with focus and emotion with their dolls? It is no wonder that many therapists and counsellors work with dolls when healing trauma. I felt a big responsibility to make her such a powerful vessel to hold all of these shadow stories but more than anything else I felt excited and very focussed.

The first question I asked the doll was who walked with her and it was clear - it was Raven. I began to lay out the silky black feathers. I thought about the doll's body and how strong she had to be - an anchor. I prepared a medicine bundle filled it with mugwort, fern roots, hawthorn flowers and peridot crystals from the Australian desert. I placed a drop of water gathered from the natural spring at the Equinox in the centre of the bundle. Everything about RavenKeeper of Secrets asked for the best. A medicine doll that was being requested so selflessly and who would be in service to so many received the finest fibres of angora, cashmere, merino and silk. Her hair is woven with Camel fibres and dyed with walnuts.

A vessel to collect your tears - RavenKeeper

And then I remembered a beautiful glass bottle from my own personal medicine bag that held the sacred waters from the Chalice Well at Glastonbury. To these waters I added an oil blend gifted to me by a wise crone here in Australia for protection and healing and saw that this was a vessel to catch the tears as the stories were shared with the doll. And that she would hold the story for them until they felt strong enough to share it with someone who could be trusted.

And finally I decorated RavenKeeper's heart with silk rays of blue light around a labradorite that I only realised much later was in the shape of a tear that looked like it was falling into the glass bottle. This stone was also one of the finest in my possession and had been gifted to me.

In 6 months time I will journey again across the ocean to gather with my sisters under the redwood trees at Spirit Weavers Gathering. I look forward to hugging Heidi again and thanking her for honouring me with the opportunity to weave such a sacred doll. I look forward to holding RavenKeeper of Secrets again too and feeling how huge her heart has grown holding all those stories.

Irina the Wolf Queen in Sherbrooke Forest

Irina the Wolf Queen

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hNB8YZDhpIo&feature=youtu.be

There are parts of Sherbrooke Forest that have been wild and then owned and settled and then wild again.  In one part of the forest, an old residence is like a ghost in the garden, all that's left of any kind of human dwelling are pathways, drystone walls and mysterious manmade pools or ponds. It is a strange place because you feel the land's history and the present all at once and even though we are allowed to enter, I still often whisper and walk very quietly in this land. All I know is that many, many years ago this garden ceased being private land and was given back to Sherbrooke Forest and the trees, the vines and the ferns have made quick work of welcoming it back to the wild.

Melbourne author, Leah Swann is not only a writer I respect and admire, she is one of my dearest and oldest friends. We met over 20 years ago when we shared a house in Scotland with, let's say, a very curious collection of people. At that time it was rare to meet another Australian living in Glasgow. A  huge amount of our early conversations involved our fascination with sacred sites and ancestral mythology and nothing has really changed! As a writer, Leah is interested in creating ways to re-wild the spirit of women and men and at the heart of her trilogy for children and young adults, Irina the Wolf Queen, is a young female heroine who lives in a wild, intuitive and magical world inspired by the archetypal wisdom of fairytales.

As soon as I read Irina the Wolf Queen I saw it instantly as a film. Recently Leah had the opportunity to create a trailer, a visual welcoming into the imagined world of Ragnor where Irina and her wolves reside and she could think of no better place than Sherbrooke Forest. The young woman you see as Irina in the trailer and doing the amazing voice over is Leah's own daughter, Brigita - the inspiration for the character of Irina. I love this! I see this as active dreaming - to be literally creating the dream world of Irina in our present time. How amazing would it have been for our own mothers to have written a tale of magic and courage and then to have placed us as young women in the main role? And so Brigita is now walking and speaking in the dream of her mother and so this dreaming now belongs to both mother and daughter and the energy created is huge because underlying it all is a such a clear intention and collective dream for the sisterhood - to become the magical heroines of our own lives and to create our own mythology.

Adorning Brigita and her wolf

It was a such a magical experience to watch the filming of this dream in Sherbrooke Forest. As usual, I am always tuning into the animals to learn more about what's going on and I spent a lot of time watching the beautiful Apollo, Irina's 'white wolf'. To say that his owner was worried about Apollo would be an understatement. Apollo is very powerful and strong, loves to chase birds and is extremely hard to catch. But like most intelligent beings, he is highly intuitive and sensitive to his environment and when he stepped into the filming and felt the focus and intention of everyone involved, he became at ease and serene. Apollo was so calmed by the conscious focus of the dreamers that he actually fell asleep in the middle of that busy forest at Brigita's feet.  I've seen this happen with our own dogs when they work with us. Even in stressful environments, the energy of creating with intention is powerfully calming. Perhaps this is a message for those of us who also feel sensitive in chaotic environments - keep your focus on the dream and what you are creating.

I believe there is a great need for stories like Irina for young women and men, if not only to create a balance with the strange message being broadcast through mainstream media to children but perhaps to even burst that bubble of pressure and illusion completely. Here's to the spirit of the wild wolf, to Irina the Wolf Queen and to the writers like Leah Swann who are creating dreams for us all to feel closer to magic and nature.

Sherbrooke Forest is a beautiful between place - between the tame and the wild. The last time Tony and I visited the garden where the filming took place we found deer tracks on the path. As we turned down a different pathway we heard the stag just ahead of us, we heard him snort and turn and disappear back into the trees.

www.leahswann.com

Purchase the Irina trilogy

She Wears the Crown - Deer Medicine and Antlered Women

 StagWoman by Alice Savage

The Wood Witch by Nadia Turner

"Originally Artemis herself was a deer, and she is the goddess who kills deer; the two are dual aspects of the same being. Life is killing life all the time, and so the goddess kills herself in the sacrifice of her own animal." 

Joseph Campbell

Sometimes we consciously track the sightings of our animal allies and sometimes they track us. I believe we have a family of animal guardians that make their presence known to us in many different ways. For myself, it is often in dreams but today as I prepared to write this letter as dedication to the medicine of Deer, I was amazed to realise just how much help and assistance Deer has been giving me all these years. I believe there is no right or wrong perception of an animal's medicine or message - it is very personal for each of us and so I can only share how the Deer shows up in my life and perhaps this will resonate for you too. I also want to share the medicine workings of a beautiful weaver who is working constantly with the spirit of Deer: Lindsy Richards. I feel that together we can find a common thread.

The first words that come to me when I think of Deer medicine are strength, grounding, intuition and sensitivity. Deer has taught me more than another animal that I need to be grounded to do intuitive work. It assisted me in creating my work and supporting myself financially through my art but only after I learnt the toughest lesson of just how dangerous it is for me to be in work environments that are damaging to my spirit. For me to talk honestly about this medicine and I understand now that Deer requires me to be truthful is to acknowledge the shadow. Recently someone commented that they hoped I was alright after reading one of my newsletters. I kind of had a little chuckle to myself - I am ok but if I just projected one side of my life where everything was light and easy that wouldn't be the truth and it wouldn't be natural. If I inspire or encourage anyone to embrace a creative life, I need to do it honestly and talk about the pitfalls as well as the heights. I think our society and media especially are interested in only presenting the light. But is it light if it is false? The cycle of nature that we get to observe so closely in the forest is always a balance between life and death. The Deer is one of the only animals where the females also grow antlers but these antlers are grown and then shed every year.

The biggest lessons I have learnt from Deer is the balance between freedom and discipline (limitation) and  independence and responsibility - when in balance beauty is created. So this medicine more than any other for me is about maturity and being healthy as I stand with one foot in the mundane world and one in the spirit world. When I do this it's as if my spirit grows antlers and I can then use them like antennae to receive messages and dreaming.

When I spoke to Lindsy there were many threads connecting us in our work but I was surprised to learn that the deepest thread was that the Deer and antlered women had come to us after a period of illness and breakdown - a kind of psychic and emotional rupture that made it impossible for us to keep trying to live in a way that wasn't truthful and authentic.

In my mid thirties I was burnt out. I had spent most of my life in fight or flight mode and working in environments that were way too harsh for me and making me very unhappy. But I thought this is just what you did - you had to survive and support yourself right? Well my body soon told me who was really in charge. I got very sick and everything I was trying to hold onto and keep together fell apart - much like the Tower card in the Tarot. But something interesting happens when you hit rock bottom - you lose your ego and realise there's nothing left to lose so why not do what you love? I had to find my joy again and when I thought of where it lay it was always with reading the Tarot.

I began to dream up Sacred Familiar - a name in dedication to my beloved animal companions and so it is not really surprising that it was Artemis who began to show herself to me - the guardian of animals, women and children. I began to surround myself with imagery of Artemis and the Deer and for the first time in m life began to create my own work doing what I loved. At the same time as working purely in an intuitive field, I was managing a business, doing my own accounts and administration for courses. I have no doubt that it was the medicine of Deer that was helping me to navigate and create balance between these feminine and masculine traits. And I began to thrive.

My first ever physical encounter with a deer was when I leading a morning meditation walk at my first retreat in Warburton, Victoria back in 2009. I had chosen this area seemingly at random - little did I know I would be returning every month in the future to draw water from the natural spring. This was the first retreat I had ever held and a week before it was to begin, my father had a life threatening stroke and almost died. I had to fly to Tasmania to now be his voice as he had lost his power of speech and mobility. Suddenly I was the adult and was filling out and signing forms I could barely understand. I flew back to Melbourne and the next day I began the retreat. I was in a daze but felt strangely calm.

On the second day we woke early and went for a walk in the mist along the Yarra River. We heard an unfamiliar sound and looked up to see a stag and doe running through the front yards of houses along the street. It was a surreal moment to say the least especially as we had been talking about the Empress and the Emperor in the Tarot and now here they were presenting themselves. Just as quickly they disappeared from sight. To see these mythical creatures, not native to Australia, in the daylight, jumping the fences of suburban homes had a strange effect - it was at once magical and at the same time very, very familiar. That whole retreat was a graceful and easy experience and one I will never forget.

My next encounter with deer was soon after we moved to Sherbrooke Forest 3 years ago. The forest called and we answered but living here was another matter entirely. We soon began to hear stories from the locals of the wild deer and stag being sighted in the winter evenings. I felt that strange tug again in my tummy - a memory that I couldn't quite catch... At night I was beginning what would become my medicine doll apprenticeship and one of the very first dolls I made was a doll I called StagWoman. You can see her in the photo below and at the top of this post you will see the incredible drawing of StagWoman by Alice Savage who is now the doll's keeper.

I made the first StagWoman (who actually lives inside Alice's StagWoman - a doll within a doll!) for myself to help me get used to living in the forest after living in cities for more than half my life. At night I would feel the heavy darkness and the movement of the animals and I felt the forest like a wild creature - Stag at my window. I was feeling old fears that I couldn't even believe I had - they felt somewhat medieval. My fear was of leaving the city or town - I worried about how to fend for myself, how to work for myself and how to survive when all of my clients lived in the city. As I was making this doll, a huge mountain ash tree fell a few metres from our home with a ground shaking explosion, sounding exactly like a car crash in the middle of the night. The next day I went and stood near the upturned roots of this fallen giant trying to come to terms with all this uncontrollable wildness - it all felt so dangerous.

As the doll grew I kept seeing antlers like the Stag growing through her hair. I was confused at first, was she male or female? She told me she was female but wore antlers. She was embodying both male and female and I let her be just that. She became an important talisman to help me find my own balance and to trust the wild that was not only all around us but also waking up inside me. Little by little I lost my fear of the forest and realised it wasn't actually even my fear but something like a bad spell or brainwashing put upon us to convince us that we need the city to survive or others to provide for us. I had to develop totally new habits and ways of working and as I did, the requests for medicine dolls grew. I now felt the spirit of the forest as a soft and caring presence who nurtured me but also confronted me when I was not being aware of nature and she would remind me to always live with nature instead of beside it or hidden inside my so called 'safe' home. I learnt that the forest is safety. The medicine dolls soon become my main source of work - work that I love and adore. And StagWoman keeps making herself known to me constantly through various different medicine doll incarnations. You can see some of them here.

Deer medicine is teaching me. And it keeps returning when I need reminding - like it's time to grow a new set of antlers. The lessons are about independence, freedom, living closer to nature and supporting myself to be here. The significance of the StagWoman is to clear and remove old beliefs around gender and what it means to be a woman living in this time now - how to be remain wild and at the same time take proper care of ourselves - to be free and responsible for ourselves at the same time.

Deer Medicine Woman: Lindsy Richards

I met Lindsy when she attended one of my medicine doll circles at Spirit Weavers in the Redwoods this year. I remember her so well because she made the most amazing Marie Antoinette medicine doll complete with gown and white cotton candy wig. When I returned home to Australia Lindsy and I connected through instagram and when I saw the images of what she creates I was blown away. Through her work with Illuminating Archetypes, Lindsy is the creator of the most captivating and fascinating headdresses - many of them antlered. She told me how it was seeing one of my antlered medicine dolls that made her want to make her own medicine doll. We have since had a couple of discussions weaving the threads that connect our work and our own healing, discovering that it was the antlered women and Artemis that helped us to heal and grow forward.

I felt I truly understood Lindsy best when I read her story The Artist Mother - A Tale of a 'Wild Woman Archetype' on her website. It's such a strong Deer medicine and Artemis tale!

Lindsy Richards

Lindsy: "Artemis is the resistance to domestication. Her twin brother Apollo (her opposite) represents the intellect and the culture, while she stands for the power of Nature and the Wild Self. She is the Goddess of the hunt, wild animals, the moon, wilderness, childbirth, virginity and protector of young girls. This Virgin Goddess symbolizes autonomy, the ability to belong to herself. She is an archetype of the self empowered woman. "Artemis comes to sanctify solitude, natural, and primitive living to which we may all return whenever we find it necessary to belong only to ourselves." ~Ginette Paris

All the animals of the forest are under Artemis's protection.  She is in such intimate relationship with them, she knows their rhythms, cycles, and habits. Yet as the huntress she must engage the primordial dance of kill and be killed. Artemis imagery is most often depicted with the deer/stag. She is a death/rebirth goddess. One who holds the mysteries of regeneration and cycles.

Artemis and Deer Wisdom: Be still and silent in developing your intuition. Trust your instincts and move swiftly. Approach your challenges with grace and determination."

I urge you to have a deeper look at Lindsy's work at Illuminating Archetypes to be taken to the realm of Deer medicine and I look forward to weaving more with Lindsy in the future!